Almost there, so close……

Then WHY, oh WHY, does it feel so far?

I’ve been re-writing the major part of a novel for the last two to three months. It’s a novel I wrote seven years ago, and the first thing I ever wrote after deciding I would write. For reasons I won’t get into right now, I went back to it. Needless to say it needed work. We change, grow, expand, see the world differently, and I saw situations in the novel that I didn’t like.

But, this post isn’t about editing, and fixing, it’s about how when I’m at the last stretch of the novel, I feel like I’m never going to get to the end. I cut, and then add in so much, it’s as if the ending is getting further instead of closer. I recognize mistakes I made along the way, and I have a file entitled Things to Wrap Up, so I know the end is not really the end. Then a read-through, and then Beta readers, and then another round. So I’m hoping to reach an end (of sorts) in January, into February at the latest. Not in the two weeks or less I’m anticipating to finish my re-write.

I find myself full of adrenaline when I write, almost panting through it. And I tell myself, slow down, enjoy the process, that’s what it’s all about, this writing stuff. And yet, I’m still counting pages.

(I found this digital image on-line, and traced it back to its creator, Christina Pereira. In it, I see myself reaching for this ending, this goal, with all the others being too high out reach for now. I’ll have to get a ladder and a basket to collect them all.)


10 thoughts on “Almost there, so close……

  1. That’s the weird thing with writing–whatever strange head space one finds oneself in, whatever phase near or far into the process you get, whatever emotions flood through and overwhelm–it’s all the writing. I love the writing. I also love to have written. 😉

    The picture is great–I so relate to the stretching toward something that always feels just out of reach–and the idea that if you reach one goal, there’s another one just beyond. We definitely need baskets! 🙂

    1. I love writing, Ev, for many many reasons, that I won’t list here. But, at times the goal takes the spotlight, and the process changes slightly, becomes almost more frantic, more urgent.

  2. I know that feeling completely. This will always happen when you strive for your creation to be perfect.
    That picture is beautiful btw, it really does tell a thousand words 🙂

  3. I don’t think you have to slow down the writing process so you can enjoy it. If you’re getting an adrenaline rush from powering through this last stretch, then go for it. Count pages if you have to, just do what it takes to get you to the end. It will be worth it 🙂

    1. You’re absolutly right, and I’ve been doing just that, Helen!! I’m getting closer, and now that the end is nearer and it’s beginning to get super exciting! Thanks for the input!!

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