do you ever self-sabotage?

I do. Sometimes. There are days when I wonder why I struggle so much to gain writing time, when it’s so difficult? When I’m exhausted and nothing is going my way, I make excuses of why I should just give up. And some of these excuses are even valid, and need to be worked through, but on certain days, I want to give in to them.

On one such day not so long ago, I was ranting and raving: How can expect to learn my craft when I’m constantly interrupted? It’s like athletics, it requires practice, and more practice! Since I can’t have this steadiness why should I bother at all? That’s it, I’m not writing anymore!

On that day, this appeared in my inbox. And my cheeks flamed up, as I flushed in shame!

Between a good artist
And a great one
The novice
Will often lay down his tool
Or brush
Then pick up an invisible club
On the mind’s table
And helplessly smash the easels and
Whereas the vintage man
No longer hurts himself or anyone
And keeps on
~ Hafiz ~

21 thoughts on “do you ever self-sabotage?

  1. Do I ever self-sabotage? Every other day. Sometimes more.

    That is a beautiful and very profound poem. How amazing that it appeared on a self-sabotage day. It’s definitely one for the “inspiration wall”.

    I wish you uninterrupted time, even if it’s not always the length of time you’d hoped for πŸ™‚

  2. I’ve been pretty good at avoiding the self-sabotaging thing lately, actually. Like I’m not going to sweat those two adverbs in the power position at the end of the previous sentence! Huzzah.
    – Sophia.

  3. Nothing better could have arrived in your mail. I think we all self-sabotage at times, some of us more than others. I guess I’m still a novice. I wish you more time, but enough perseverance and wisdom not to smash it all when you don’t have it.

  4. At least you have the self-awareness to look back and recognize the moment for the kick in the pants it was. That’s half the battle. Keep after it.

    1. Oh thanks, Jonathan. Right now the self-sabotage has moved onto ‘this is sooo unoriginal!!” It’s good that 99% of the time I can disregard these thoughts and not give them any meaning.
      Hope your writing is going well!

  5. I think my habit of snoozing my alarm clock and then not having time for breakfast before work is my subconscious trying to sabotage my day. I always have the last laugh though, by picking up a pastry from the bakery on the walk into town. πŸ™‚

    1. the image you evoke with the phrase Helen..ummmmmmm.
      I see myself in Halifax, pre-kids, the salt of the sea on my lips, the scent of fresh baked pastry. lol how odd, I never even was in Halifax pre-kids.
      Oh the power of words! lol

      enjoy those pastries, and that walk! sounds gorgeous!! oh, and even enjoy pressing the snooze button. πŸ™‚

      (i’ve all nostalgic…that doesn’t happen to me very often!)

  6. Hello there.
    Well yes, I do self sabotage and now I have printed out your poem and it is above the computer where I can see it every day. Thanks for sharing.


    1. I’m glad you found it, Judith!

      For me, it points out the proper perspective. It also makes me smile, and I find it very inspiring.
      I hope it brings much of the same πŸ™‚

  7. I agree with Linda, that we likely all self-sabotage at one time or another. The difference is we don’t let it get us down for long. Oh, I well remember making declarations that I was giving up. I now know better than to do say that.

    The right message always seems to reach us at the right time, doesn’t it?

    1. It does, Laura. I don’t know that I would be able to give up writing, and even when ranting I don’t think I really mean it. But why bother spending so much energy on being angry and upset? Sometimes, my monkey brain takes over and I get caught up in the moment. Thankfully there are great moments like these when I’m sent the right thing that me smile at my own foolishness πŸ™‚

  8. I try to write every day, but sometimes I can’t do after a long afternoon/evening at work. I tend to get stressed if I miss a day though.

    Best wishes with your writing.

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